when in Rome, do as Romans do.

phew what a week!! :D

been speending some quality time with my AIESEC new friends... they're cool! I think I'm attached to them already...I'm starting to see them as my family just the way I did with my friends in singapore.
Hedonistic much ?!?! but nevermind once in a while is okay right? xD

I had a chat with my super beloved bestie in Singapore, she was studying and her skype was on so.. haha sorry for bothering you girl, but I dont think you'll read this anyway. I started telling her about my life here, we shared stories, she told me about the stressful times of A levels while I shared them my new friends and experiences and campus and hockey and AIESEC and crushes and all....

then the topic veered into why I still miss Singapore alot... Damn that girl can dig anything out of me :P

so I told her that I miss the food, the buses, mrts, hostel n most of all: friends.
then I told her about my frustration with the people here.

I told her how badly I wanted to slap a friend of mine in the face when he said that he hates Malaysians and accuse them of stealing Indo's culture etc. I told her how I got so angry that I cried, not out of sadness but out of rage, for the first time this year. I told her how I miss the consideration that is always present in Singapore's daily lives, how intolerable discrimination is in the eyes of the people there, and how different it is with the people here. I told her how much it hurts when people here speak (badly or wrongly) about foreigners with such confidence, not knowing that I know lots of them personally.

"It hurts, when my own friends trash talk people from this country and that country. Because all of you are my friends, and I know you guys aren't like that... and the worst part is I couldn't do crap about it, I just swallowed all of it in."
well that's the gist of what the conclusion was. She was silent throughout my rants. She's malaysian by the way, and one of my most bestest closest beloved friend I ever had.

Can you feel my pain? I wanted so badly to stand up for the people who were misunderstood, stand up for HER, but when I tried they would just fire back at me with more retorts and more hatred that I didn't know what else can I do.

One of my seniors in AIESEC, a friend of mine, once made me so sad that I cried in my sleep. We were having this conference thingy, there were some intl delegates including a malaysian guy, and every delegates were supposed to stage a performance about their culture. This guy sang a song that is also known as the traditional song here and apparently people in Indo couldn't accept the fact that there are other countries singing this song (i dunno but this is from my pov anw). Later that night, we had evaluation and she brought this up. She made it sound as if what he did was unforgivable, that the song only belongs to Indo. I think I rolled my eyes at her, as a joke-like response, but in reality I was hurt. I love her cos she's my friend and I guess that just made it hurt even more.

When you have someone you truly care about, truly love and truly hold close to your heart, whatever accusations or trash talk about that someone would hurt you just as bad as it would hurt her/him.

Why can't we all live together and share what we have? Why must this be ours and that be theirs only? Why not share? Why not accept the fact that we are closely related whether you like it or not?

Her response was calm and composed...such a wise girl indeed.
She said I have to get used to it because that is how things are in Indo. This place is not filled with foreigners, people do not mix with those other than their own kinds and thus they do not understand what I have understood since 3 years ago. She said its okay for me to try and fix their mindsets but advised me not to be so emotional as it might backfire, instead of fixing things up I might end up receiving hateful glares.

I know she's right. When in Rome right? but then again I don't think I can stand it everyday. Not when I feel like I gotta stand up for her against my own friends here. Do I really have to get used to this awful feeling??

And this makes me miss my friends n family in Singapore even more.

God give me strength